30 years ago today. One of the best days/concerts even though RHCP really tanked. Ministry was fantastic and the pit was simply amazing. PJ was practically the opener. Which is crazy to think about. The day blew our minds. Unforgettable! What. A. Trip!
a week ago, mom would have been 75 years old. which got me thinking about what she would have liked if she were still here. what does one get a 75 year old? likely she has everything she would need. but its also a milestone so whatever it was, it would likely have to something super special to mirror the importance of the occasion. which all got me thinking about the immaterial or for example, lifestyle changes she might approve of or feel were a good idea as her gift.
now im sure theres a good portion of society that has developed some “not-so healthy” habits during the myriad of lockdowns and pandemic isolations of the past few years. personally, looking at what i have been doing, i’d generally say that my consumption of alcohol was at a higher level. likely the highest its ever been in my life. i couldn’t really recall the last day where i had not had at least a drink. i had been thinking about cutting it down over the past few weeks. the switch to mainly lighter beers was already in effect because a noticeable weight gain was starting to irritate. so why not go the whole nine yards? quit alcohol all together? mom would definitely approve.
never had i thought that alcohol could be a problem. id always had a low tolerance (thanks for those genes mom!) so drinking too much in relation to many others around me seemed like a ridiculous notion. but we all have our own standards and levels. i had been noticing that my appetite for a beer after a long day had become more voracious. perhaps a sign of what could lie ahead. i was starting to highly anticipate the next chance for a pint. drinking alone had become a norm. new body aches and pains were developing and when i would look them up on the internet there was always one similarity in the list of potential causes, alcohol consumption.
many reasons led me to this decision. much like when i went veggietarian. that was a combination of reasons. so is this. its for health reasons. its for lifestyle reasons. its to feel again. to have more energy. its to remember more. to see and feel in a different way. it to be more present. its to not be dependant on something. its for independence. its for a hopefully longer, happier life. its to save money for more important things. its to live the way i want to live. somehow i had slipped away from all that.
it hasn’t been an easy 8 days. there have been poor sleeps, shakes, headaches, dizziness, and fever (which most of mimic covid symptoms but kept testing negative for that). i learnt that your body compensates over time for alcohol. it works harder to get things done or has to try different methods to reach its goals. so this was just the body readjusting to a new normal. one other thing i learnt (much like when i went veggie) that there are a lot of alternatives now on the market. so fooling my body into thinking we were still drinking was super easy and has really, really helped so far. also just by chance, a good tasting non-alcoholic beer has been on sale at our local grocery store. another reason this was good timing and now was that time.
last friday’s gig was a big test. going out to a bar and not drinking? whoa. luckily they had one non-alcoholic brew that the bottle not only looks like the real thing but also tastes similar. crisis averted and i still had a great time. im sure for the foreseeable near future, every day will be a challenge with bumps to manage.
now i don’t know if this is a forever thing. but right now it just feels right. it feels like the right thing to do. if it lasts forever then so be it. goodbye alcohol. it was fun but then it was not. i never thought id be saying goodbye to ya. now to remove myself from a lot of breweries email lists and social media accounts and to figure out what to do with all this beer related merchandise! it just feels weird to have so much around and when did i get so much?
happy 75th mom.